Big shoulders....

It's been a tough week here on the homefront....  emotionally and physically draining.

Two with ear infections, one with a ruptured eardrum, all four with fevers, and now one with diarrhea..... and ...

my Mom being so sick with pneumonia back in Missouri.

(she's in ICU now, but I *hope* she'll be out soon)

I've run the gamut of fear, worry, guilt, frustration.... and in between....

should I be with my Mom?  should I be here with my children?  should I be in a loony bin?

It is in times like these that I find the emotional baggage of the past comes to haunt me.....

like a disparaging ghost to shroud my soul in a thick mist of confusion and angst.

I can't find my way.... what should I do..... what are my motivations?

A blogging friend of mine (who just happens to share my name) posted this video on Friday.
And like a breath blown from God himself.... the fog lifted and my way seemed clear.
I need to focus on the family God has given me.... to care for them... to put aside the debilitating worry and guilt and find my way so that I can lead my children, and be a good wife.
(My mom is in good hands... and if I'm needed, I will know.)
And to do this... I need Him to lead me.
.... I cannot do it on my own.... my shoulders are not broad enough to be everything to everyone...
....but His are....

And then... YouTube (as it is want to do) led me to this video....

Wow!  Gut punch. Forgiven.

I'm glad He has big shoulders.

****Regardless of your personal beliefs... these videos have amazing videography.****

The images, colors, settings, and photographs spoke to me as a photographer....

I watched the videos over and over again just for the beautiful images, not just the words.

I hope they bless you as well.

(I have a new favorite group to listen to now, thanks to Wendy!)